choice // determination

February, or, when all your New Year’s resolutions are answered!

You know when you’ve walked up all the stairs grumbling to your parents probably you’ve done your homework but there’s no TV, then all those tooth brushing things are finished and you pull back your pink chenille bottom bunk bed cover and then suddenly your head is attached to the top bunk and your hair is held by the springs because out from the pink fringing a black ankle stalking hunter has launched a needle clawed, full tooth attack? Well that happened for me many nights as a kid.

Arrg! Ok you’d think I’d learn but who is always present? Every time I could get so mad and kick and tear my hair (really), hanks hanging from the wire or I would laugh, detach myself strand by strand and join in for the game.

It gets like that now too. Do you get that? Like that car cutting me off in traffic, or the kids asking ‘why-is-the-sky-blue?’ questions when it’s time to tie shoes, or that perfect solution coming to me, an hour too late.

Any time I can lose it, or keep it together or, better yet I can rise to an all-new place of wonder and thanks. What if? Like my old aunt used to say “oh, these things are sent to try me”. What if they are? What if they were all sent for you to try out a new you.

I made my new year’s resolutions, didn’t you? I sent them out the winds, to god, to the universe and then? Well, I think this is them coming back.

What if this year you asked for more patience, more kindness, more joy, more boldness? (ok that’s mine). So then you step back and watch and all the situations set up just for you, to try them out. Make your choices. All your buttons are checked and notably poked to see what you do. Hey and if you don’t get it the first time – there’s plenty more coming to practice on.

I don’t know what I was asking for as a kid but I know the Universe wants to give me every chance to be my brightest and best me. I might have messed up on some of those chances (ok lots) but now I really know and I’m repeating to myself - The Universe sends me only Angels! And I’m up for welcoming them in.

Sometimes it feels like Clouseau calling on Cato, to keep me on my toes, but mostly it feels like a breath of fresh air when I can turn about, grateful, play along and choose something new.

Hint. Any dose of giggles helps!

Good luck :)

What angel's knocking on your door??

Ok - I'll go first . . .
Like the big angel of my kids homework procrastination just turns a big mirror on my own. I can see all those projects marching up and tapping me on the shoulder . . . ok ok, stop trying to fix him - open my own front door :)

What's yours?


I feel emboldened today
to jump

to dive right in
to step off
the ledge of the known
and into the blue, the new

It can seem like just me in a big unknown
but I leap hand in hand with friends.
All you just starting too, all who have been before,
standing below knowing
I won't fall, but fly.

Catcher in the Rye

I hadn't read that story before but now I know that's why.
Why it is named that way, to catch those daring to try,
to have a go.

Thanks to my fellow jumper Leanne, as brave as a bear, inside.
She's stepped out on a limb to be there to show that it's fine, even when it feels so high.

I want to stand beside and whisper in the ear of those, who stand there shy with curled up toes
on the edge of the boat that's brought them, out into the sea of life
who knows how deep or shallow, you go with friends not foes.
And what I know inside me is, that clustered all around you are invisible angels shouting - go!

Back there that little me, didn't have a swan dive yet or even a belly flop.
I reckon she just took a step.
And off my life has been.
Lot's of steps and stories, now gathered up behind me
leaning me into this next step
full of fears and potential, standing on the edge.
Hands together in prayer, now stretch them out to dive
over your ears said my first swim teacher.
Don't listen to all those voices
trying to keep you  safe.
Listen to your heart and dive now
know that you can fly.

thanks to Kelly Rae for her flight lessons and all my fellow flyers.

And my team of angels who's wings I feel, inspiring my heart.

A blind surfer once told me "If it's worth doing, it's worth doing badly"
What's the latest big small step you've taken?
I'd love to hear

(yep that's really me and my favourite little boat :)